Get Laid …
Written on Nov 14, 2006 // Musing.Yet another old entry … here we go …
Gina came around for lunch. She’s a very trendy woman, you know - the Samantha Jones version in Sex In the City. Wet today, she came in the house with her 6 inch stilettos that serves like a lethal weapon to me.
I put on the kettle as she plonked herself provocatively on the sofa.
She’s wearing white laces bra today. o_O (It was a glimpse!)
Me: Hey Gina, do you want any sugar in ya tea uh ?
Gina: Ummm … You know what !!! One thing I’d really don’t understand, why you men are so bad at getting women to FUCK with you men uh ? We WANT to sleep with men but i’m sorry to say but the way men handle seduction is so FUCKING clumsy. We are simple ! Just simple ! We want to FUCK FUUCK FUUUUUUCK !
She’s now banging herself forth and back unto the sofa when she emphasize on the ” FUCK FUCK FUCK ” locutions. The sofa moves slightly back offset making the shrieks.
Eeek … eeek …. eeeeeeeeeeek !!!
They’re in sync.
Gina: Honestly Mikel, getting women into the sack doesn’t rely on a HUUUUUGE cock (although they’re nice), BIIIIIIIG car ( those are nice too okay ?) or alchemy ?( I prefer platinum than gold alright ?). Our women’s legs are like garden shears, ready to spring open at any moment if you …. and here’s the thing … pretend you don’t need sex with them.
She open her legs wide, DAMN that lucky she’s wearing jeans today.
Me: Hmmm
Gina: And what’s that about all the playing cool and aloof uh? I mean yeah, you have to play it in a very natural way ! Not like giving off vibes that you masturbate three times a day in the loos in university. NO !!! Getting on with a woman is about making non-sexual contact. We don’t want some guy that’s totally into us all the time. But we also don’t want a guy who doesn’t give a shit !!!
Silence …
Gina: And look, if you want to get sex, be interested but not desperate. Be charming and silly but not desperate. Just wait a bit and all will be worth the bling. We women just hate men who seems as if they’re dating their own hands !!! How hard is it to not to be a PRAT uh ? UH ? UH ? UH ? RIGHT ?
Me: I have only asked if you want sugar in your tea, Gina.
Gina: Oh. Yeah. Two please … Thanks.
She then smiled non-chalantly at me.
It was yet … another long long long weekend …
Splashmilk is Mikel, an engineer (that doesnt quite epitomize his presentation),
a photography amateur (because he just want to shoot Angelina Jolie... naked), an insanely quirky graphic designer.
Your pure evil let loosed around Kuala Lumpur urbanscapes, Malaysia.
im happy for you xoxo
Splashmilk
Nov 14, 2006, 9:44 amHow was your weekends?
stev
Nov 14, 2006, 9:09 pmlong long weekend eh…
now if there was ‘action’ wed be wishing that the weekend was even longer
my weekend? lots of sex. no creaking sofas tho. but good idea that.
yen
Nov 14, 2006, 11:05 pmdude u really write good stuff at the right time.
as for my weekend. pfft everybody balik kampung. so only the penang boii and sarawak boiis are left here. b-b-boring.
Evie
Nov 14, 2006, 5:23 am(=_=)” on your current post…. “We are simple ! Just simple ! We want to FUCK FUUCK FUUUUUUCK !”
Er, not all women are like tat yah… hehehehe… tat wan too hyper dee and din get laid for so long liao… bwahahahaha…
howdy~!!
Splashmilk
Nov 14, 2006, 10:24 amStev: Creaking of sofas, Momentus banging on wall, Frictional rubbing of your skin against the tiles or crashing of the mirrors, glasses, plates … or more so … the stimulating vibrations of that washing machine of yours … your weekend are heavenly
[cough cough]
Yen: Verdict on you … are you still sexually frustrated uh?
Evie: Like i said … we dont call Samantha Jones for nothing aye?
StephenLim
Nov 14, 2006, 5:57 pmHaha.. my first visit here.. and it is about sex for the first post i read?! Errm… *Yeah, i like it!*, *Everyone like it too!*
Thanks for dropping by, u have a interesting blog Mike! Nice meeting u!
Pinkfrog
Nov 14, 2006, 6:52 pmI wish…I wish…=)…
Pinkfrog
Nov 14, 2006, 6:53 pmBy the way, weekend was well spent in Penang!! Banged up TOO MANY RAW files…..ARGHH have to process them..computer lagging now..
patchay
Nov 14, 2006, 10:35 pmHey splashmilk…thanx for visiting my blog. Nice post here…well maybe becoz of the topic sex! I’ll link ur blog at mine too…
La'enCier
Nov 14, 2006, 1:21 amdo reasonable women really so desperate…duh…it’s a whore
jo
Nov 14, 2006, 2:47 amwah..get laid..
some easy n simple as that..just laid there forever nv wake up again..some laid everywhere, everytime & with everyone.
want to get a laid?
need some tactic one..dun simply jump to bed just hump for nothing, get a pillow then..ahahhaha
hm…everyone do need some fantasies…relax..rejoice..have fun..
the most important aint the result, is the process!!
muaahhhahaa
b4 weekend is coming, remember the ’significant’ day is coming soon too..gagaga..
Utopia FM乌托邦无聊日记
Nov 14, 2006, 3:33 am圣诞欢喜城
一年一度的响乐特辑又来了。这次又是由Utopia FM乌托邦无聊日记主办。其中一个单元就是为了圣诞节这个温馨幸福的季节而设的单元，圣诞欢喜城。圣诞欢喜城需要你们，各位乌托帮的参与和支持，这个单元才能够真正符合它的题名，欢喜城。只要你圣诞故事的分享，你圣诞城市的照片，你为世界带来的温馨幸福的圣诞欢喜城而出的一份力， 我们Utopia FM都无任欢迎。
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这个特辑将会在十二月陆续上档，希望你能够参与我们的圣诞欢喜城。因为你的分享就能够完成我们的圣诞欢喜城。让我们都以最完美的心情，快乐拥有每一份世界各地的天使给我们的祝福和心情。
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Utopia FM乌托邦无聊日记
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圣诞欢喜城，敬请期待。
Splashmilk
Nov 14, 2006, 10:34 amStephenLim: Nice meeting you! And yeah … everyone likes it!
Pinkfrog: U wish for what wor? What’s more can u wish when u already have a D80?!
Patchay: Ahahaha! No problem!
La’enCier: Its hard to say … when adrenaline rushes in the head … logic was drown completely.
Jojo: Aiya! I remember lah!!!
Utopia FM: WoOt!
Jason Siah
Nov 14, 2006, 1:58 pmSugar in the tea = FUCK FUCK & FUCK ?!?!?!?!
Hahahaha.. funny funny… =P
~J~
Jason Siah
sylsyl
Nov 14, 2006, 2:58 pmmy last weekend ah…
went to station one, korean bbq n manhattan fish market wif mikel, tony n jo lo.. hehehehe…
ok… here i start 1st…
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIKEL DEAR!!”
i know its 2mrw.. but i cannot wait liao lo.. i knoe im very impatient one.. hahahaha… selamat ulang tahun mikel (indo’s version)….. ^^
Splashmilk
Nov 14, 2006, 5:38 pmJason Siah: I shall remember not to ask u for sugars next time i’m having coffee with you.
sylsyl: Hahaha! Thanks love!
Infectioner
Nov 14, 2006, 10:51 pmI had learn a valuable lesson now XD
s2k
Nov 14, 2006, 7:52 amHahahaha…
Funny shit….
–|[s2k]|–
teddY
Nov 14, 2006, 7:55 amROFLMAO. Although there is no clearly stated joke, after processing the whole story again with my slow brain (yes I have a S - L - O - W brain),I got the joke. Haha. That Gina must be out of her mind!
And, yeah. Never ask for sugar anymore. Just give her the large dose of sugar cubes and make her diabetic (that’s the right way!). HAHA
Anyways, happy birthday splashmilk (and now I wonder why KL calls u NEN NEN *but yes I understand what NEN NEN means*)
Splashmilk
Nov 14, 2006, 9:14 amInfectioner: Indeed, you have. (*nod *nod)
s2k: ah … in a very much indirect kinda sense.
teddy: You didnt even contact me when u come down to KL! But … thanks for your wishes!
James
Nov 14, 2006, 3:19 pmeh she wanted to fuck you?! I dun get it
btw Happy birthday
Evie
Nov 14, 2006, 2:06 amHappy Bday to you, many happy retunrs of the day… and oh i knew it by BengHan’s blog..
Have fun!
damion
Nov 14, 2006, 8:05 pmhappy belated birthday dude..
been busy i havent been blog hopping..
bodicea
Nov 14, 2006, 8:50 pmgood stuff.
hm. i really don’t feel the urge beyond foreplay tho.
yet?
hm.